When the tsunami rolled into our consciousness via satellite news we watched in disbelief, unable to imagine a world with such devastation. Day after day, the horror mounted as we shook our heads, turned our faces from the constant updates, wept, and then opened our purses.

When our government was accused of a less-than-generous response and President Bush replied that we were a compassionate people, we took up the clarion and immediately sent donations to surpass the proffered American gift. Within a week, privately we had given more money than that to which our nation had committed. We, as a people, do care about others when we see their pain and suffering, especially if those "others" are children. In Asia, in the blink of an eye, over 220,000 (current estimate) people’s lives were lost to the sea; the sea which, for the majority, gave them life.

I saw the news images at the YMCA, having refused to allow television in my home since Hurricane Hugo. Having survived that horrific natural disaster in the Virgin Islands (where we had hurricane force winds for 12 hours and the winds in the islands topped 200mph), I found it difficult to watch this one. Hugo brought destruction, but very little loss of life. We did not see whole towns or islands disappear. On St. Thomas there was great thanksgiving after the storm because we had survived. Many lost their roofs, some their houses, and we were without power for months. Parts of St. Croix were powerless for a year. Our own villa had power restored after two months, but my family had [our charter sailboat] Satori to return to, which had solar panels, converters, rain catchers, and the ability to leave if we so desired. Less fortunate souls had to deal with daily survival without electricity, roofs, and any way to prevent the onslaught of mosquitoes that followed. Many lost their appreciation for life. For almost a year, everyone was in a very bad mood.

The effects of that hurricane forced Ed and I to look at our lifestyle. We decided we could not continue to live in harm’s way with our daughter, Lyric. We put our villa and our schooner up for sale and left the islands.

But the people in Asia had unbelievably more trauma in the span of a few moments. So many perished. Whole families disappeared; worse yet, parents had to choose which child to save. Nothing was left on which to survive. Suddenly their whole world ceased to exist: there was no infrastructure to help those wounded and dying, no food, no water, no hope.

Later I read an account on the Internet of Yacht Aragon, which was at anchor in Thailand, part of 10 yachts sailing together in a blue water cruising group around the world. When I tried to tell a friend about the crew’s experience, I started to cry and my throat closed. All the vessels and their crews survived, but they will be forever changed. Their nightmares will take many more years to heal, if they ever can escape the memory of what they experienced.

I found a new awareness of how little we suffer compared to what the rest of the world endures. What about the 100,000+ who have died in Iraq: families that have lost children, homes, and whole communities to our bombs? (based on the British Lancet survey.)

Or, what about the genocide in Sudan? How do people cope in a constant hell from which there is no escape? If those images were filling our airwaves each day, would we not be as generous as we were to those who suffered in the tsunami?

If we daily faced that death and suffering, would we work harder to put an end to that which we could prevent?

Deepak Chopra has a new book, The Way is Peace. He is asking us to commit on an individual basis to peace. He believes it is the step needed to snowball our world to peace and compassion. If there is awareness, it can effect reality.

Asheville plans to honor Kindness Week, February 13-20th as one of 500 cities and towns nationwide celebrating the occasion. The city also strives to be a Community of Kindness in the upcoming year, one of 11 nationwide. Can you imagine how wonderful it would be to live in a city known for its kindness? It might just snowball and spread to the surrounding communities. And think of the bumper stickers. Instead of "land of sky" (which has its share of pollution) they might say, Asheville, land of kindness!

When I was new to Unity, Chad gave a sermon about Random Acts of Kindness and how people nationwide were doing simple things to show a moment’s kindness to their fellow earth travelers. The idea was to do it anonymously, without any expectation for return. In Hawaii, they call it aloha; more than just hello or good-bye, it is doing something for someone out of the goodness of your heart.

Y.O.U. (teens) took Lyric out into the community one Sunday to do simple acts of kindness such as helping people with their groceries and visiting people in a rest home. She remarked how good it felt to give of herself.

Unity has always been a church of giving. The holiday bears, Christmas gifts, our prayer circle support, and the tithing by the church are some of the ways that Unity shares kindness with the community. When I think of kindness, I equate it with Unity.

Random Acts of Kindness can be as simple as my husband’s bringing me a cup of coffee each morning while I ready for work. It is one of the many ways he tells me he loves me and that I am important to him. As we approach Valentine’s Day, consider ways to commit small acts of kindness for those you love. And don’t forget acts of kindness toward others during Kindness Week. Here are a few suggestions:

• Give an honest compliment. Compliments make the giver and receiver feel good, and they are simple and free! My mother dresses beautifully and when strangers stop and tell her she looks lovely, it makes her day. My husband always compliments my cooking—after every meal, and he has done so for 30 years. I don’t get tired of hearing that he appreciates the effort I put into making delicious, healthy meals for our family.
• Let that car in line, and don’t be mad if another follows suit. If we knew people were going to be polite drivers instead of selfish ones, we would all be happier behind the wheel. Don’t be quick to use the horn or hand signs when someone wrongs you on the road. We all make mistakes sometimes.
• Take time to really listen. Look the person in the eye and don’t interrupt what they are saying. This can be the most important gift you can give your child. It validates them and boosts their self-esteem.
• Apologize. If you blow it and have said or done something wrong, fess up and say you’re sorry. You'll both feel better about it. We often fail to do this with our spouses and it is probably the most important way to keep resentments from building in relationships.
• Do something for a friend or loved one just to be nice—take him to lunch, bring her a flower, give her a foot rub—anything that says you appreciate them.
• If you have a small child, offer a half-hour of your time to play any game they wish. We get so caught up in the business of "have tos" that we don’t take time to play. Make time.
• Make time for your mate, too. Take a walk together, or spend a half-hour alone cuddling or talking. It can put a smile on everyone’s face. My folks had a sign on their bedroom door: DON’T GO AWAY MAD, JUST GO AWAY. When the door was shut, it meant it was their time, period. No whining, no asking what they were doing, no interruptions. I believe children are better off knowing their parents like each other and like to spend time alone together (as well as time with their kids.)
• Say thank you, please, you’re welcome, and I love you to all of your family as well as your friends. Politeness is a foundation of kindness.
• Give thanks for all that you have and show appreciation—it can disappear in the blink of an eye.
• Pray for peace. Commit to peace. Show compassion for others. We can make it a better world if we take that first step.

~ Gabrielle M. Thompson, 2005
© 2005 Gabrielle M. Thompson

Gabrielle Thompson lives with her husband Ed and daughter Lyric in the mountains of western North Carolina at Eco-Cove, a 117-acre wildlife sanctuary and trout farm. She has a degree in Anthropology and is Coordinator of Library Services at McDowell Technical Community College. Previously she helped Ed build, sail, and charter the 75’ schooner, SATORI for 14 years in the Virgin Islands. She is a freelance writer and has written two unpublished novels. She has had an article published in Moments of Grace Magazine, with an introduction by Neale Donald Walsch.